I live in a suburb of Des Moines, IA – self-proclaimed “Insurance Capital of the World”. And much like the appliance industry, the names never change, only the titles and companies of one’s employment. So because I have so many friends in the industry, I gave into peer pressure and went to work for one of these institutions. The saying “the grass isn’t always any greener” was soon translated to “the grass was scorched by Round-Up”. And I had a friend share this with me, so here you all go:

Phase 1

You are listening to jazz — Your first day at work is great. Your fellow co-workers are wonderful, your office is cute, you love your agents, and your manager is the best!

Phase 2

You are listening to pop music — After a while you are so busy that you are not sure if you’re coming or going anymore.

Phase 3

You are listening to heavy metal — This is what you feel like after ONE month.

Phase 4

You are listening to hip hop — You become bloated due to stress, you’re gaining weight due to lack of exercise because you are so tired and have so much work to do and, when you do get home, you feel sluggish and suffer from constipation. Your fellow co-workers are too cheerful for your liking, your agents don’t understand a word you say and the walls of your office are closing in.

Phase 5

You are listening to GANGSTA RAP — After more time passes, your eyes start to twitch and you forget what a ‘good hair day’ feels like as you just fall out of bed and load up on caffeine.

Phase 6

You are listening to the voices in your head — You have locked your office door to keep people out. You wonder WHY you are even here in the first place and WHY you became an insurance professional!